The business of beauty: playing on our insecurities

I have found that people who try to make you insecure have an ulterior motive. Normal people don't go around putting down others. For example, my regular aesthetician says that I don't have any blackheads and we forego the painful procedure upon my request because it doesn't make much of a difference. Some days ago, my Vietnamese hairdresser was trying to convince that I need a special facial package to remove my blackheads. I had to say firmly,'No thanks. I have a regular aesthetician who takes care of me.'

Another day, a saleswoman of a luxury cosmetics and skin care brand said that I have to use an undereye cream because I am getting dark circles. I do get circles easily if I stay up late at night. Not my strong forte. I am a morning person now. But the primary reason was that I used a certain liquid liner with high-density pigment which gave a sharp line but was difficult to clean up even after using makeup remover wipes, cleansing milk, and face wash; leaving the sensitive eye area darker after each application. So I starting sporting a nude eye look instead. It goes well in Summer and I am out with the shades during daytime anyways.

So this brings me back to the topic again. Why do people try to play on your insecurities? What do they want to sell to you? What is it that they want to hide about yourselves that they distract you with your flaws? And to feel better about ourselves, we hide behind contoured cheeks. And then they comment' OMG! Why do you put so much makeup?'

I have realized that you can never make some people happy. They will always find something to complain about. And it has absolutely nothing to do with you. It is just their perspective. A friendly advice is quite different from a mocking tone. We are grown up enough to understand the difference.

We should avoid people who try to make us feel inferior. Our time can be spent well elsewhere. Maybe cooking something for our friends, or just talking to someone over the phone whom we really connect with. Sometimes, just doodling or reading a book. At least, we will learn something new.

We are often too polite to ask people to back off. But this builds resentment. I don't want you to be a snowflake who feels slighted by others too easily. It is just about managing your energy better and focusing on what really matters.