Bits and pieces is what I have. I have never tried to comprehend the whole of myself at once.I know it will take time. In my journey towards self realization- be a witness and share your thoughts.
This has been more than just my web log since May 2005. Some posts are copyright of Genesis Publishers.
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In one world,
I married the first man I fell in love with
And lived my life thinking that I am not good enough
I slipped through the cracks in the floor
And walked on my tiptoes around him
Trying to stay invisible
So as not to arouse his anger
At the unfairness of having to live with something subhuman like me.
In another world,
I made the mistake of falling in love with the wrong man
But I learned early
To never value the happiness of someone else over my self-esteem.
So, I toiled hard to become someone with worldly success.
But I lost faith in love and in human connections.
I guess I lost there too.
In my ideal world,
I waited for the right person to sweep me off my feet
Sure, I made a few mistakes here and there-
But that did not deter me from believing in the best of people
And the possibility that I too could find happiness.
Like a self-fulfilling prophecy
It came to life
I dreamed my ideal world into existence.
It is possible to have it all
Only if we have the courage to believe.
Or maybe I have lived all these lives
In just one life.
And if you saw me
You couldn’t say which one was me living through what.
Fantastic story! A must-read for fans of multiverse themes. Sometimes, especially during tough times, we ponder upon the roads not taken, the choices we made in our life that made it branch the way it has. What if we were given the option to experience all the possible permutations? What makes us truly us? What is our real identity without superficial social constructs? Are we just the sum total of our choices? I have reflected upon these thoughts before and this book brought those ideas to my mind again. Our ideal life is with the people we love, and no matter the external circumstances, we always find a way home when we know that. Highly recommend it for both the entertainment and philosophical aspects. Kudos to the author! I liked watching Wayward Pines (TV) and recently purchased the audible versions of the series. Can't wait to read/listen to my next Blake Crouch novel.
Santa Clara Poet Laureate Mike McGee invited some poets to write ekphrastic poems based on the exhibits of San Jose Museum of Art. Ekphrasis is the vivid, often dramatic, verbal description of a visual work of art, either real or imagined.
My piece was based on ’History of Science II’ by Catherine Wagner in the Gibson gallery.
Take a moment to look at the chromogenic print.
For a more immersive experience, please visit the San Jose Museum of Art.
The library of souls
——————————
This is me-
All my emotions sorted into shelves
Then labeled and archived.
One shelf is for my mother-
Who learned early in life
That the only way a woman could live with dignity
Was by earning her own living.
Her face burned in the summer sun
When she walked home from the school she taught in
This book resonated with me because a lot of my own personal beliefs were reaffirmed. For example, I believe that education is a way to achieve freedom when your resources are finite. I believe in speaking for those who are brushed aside. I believe in owning my story and saying it out loud.
The book is divided into three parts- her childhood in South Side of Chicago, her life before and after meeting Barack Obama, and her life as the First Lady. Throughout the book, she has mentioned her insecurities of not fitting in - something a lot of women feel when they have achieved something substantial. When I got admission to my B-school, I kept thinking that it is a dream. And I will wake up pining for a life that I could only dream of. Constant criticism bothers me even now and I often forget that people who engage in judging others often do so to feel good about themselves. Their own achievements too few to keep them focused in their own business.
There are several lessons to learn here. One of the important take away was that all the world saw in 2008 was the first African-American President of the United States. But the Obamas led a grassroots level campaign with a message that made a large number of people turn up to vote on election day. It was no fluke. It was hard work, determination, and hope. It opens my heart to the possibility that as a first generation immigrant, with an unusual name (for some), I too can follow my dreams to where they may lead me. That fear is for another day.
আমার সকল কৃতিত্বের পর একরাশ দীর্ঘশ্বাস হানা দেয় বারে বারে । নিজেকে বোঝাই শুধু -একা থাকাটা কি অন্যায় ? একজন সফল নারী কেন পারবে না একজন সফল পুরুষের মতো মাথা উঁচু করে দাঁড়াতে? কেন কানাঘুষো, ফিসফাস ? দেহের রন্ধ্রে রন্ধ্রে সেই ফিসফিস নাগপাশের মত পেচিয়ে ধরে । প্রাণ বুঝি এই যায়, সেই যায়।
এতদিন তোমাদের মনোরঞ্জন করেছি আমার গান শুনিয়ে । সেই ললিতকলার মান রাখ অন্তত । কেন অনুষ্ঠানের শেষে চোখের লালসায় একে একে আমার ব্লাউজের বোতাম খুলে দিতে চাও ? আশীর্বাদ করার ভান করে আমার পিঠে হাত বুলিয়ে ব্রায়ের স্ট্র্যাপ অনুভব করার চেষ্টা করো? কি করে সাহস হয় তোমাদের ? আমি বিবাহিত না বলে?
আমার শুভ পরিণয় হয়ে গিয়েছিল আমার ষোল বছর বয়সে । মনে মনে তাঁকে আমার স্বামী স্বীকার করেছিলাম । তিনি আজ নেই । শুধু তাঁর দেওয়া সুর রয়ে গেছে ।
তোমাদের মত অসম্পন্ন পুরুষ যখন আমাকে লিপ্সার চোখে দেখে তখন আমার ঘেন্না হয় ।এই নারী জীবনের প্রতি বিতৃষ্ণা হয়।
ভালো লাগে একটা নিষ্পাপ জিনিসকে এভাবে নষ্ট করে দিতে ? কি শাস্তি দেব তোমাদের - নীরবতা ছাড়া ?
