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Tuesday, January 24, 2006

Musings...

I wish I could weave together the words that could most aptly say what you mean to me.
But I am so inept.Never before have I been so brutally confronted with this paucity of mine..
But then to lament...I can't..
Coz you mean..so much more than words can ever say...

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I stab my heart ..I make it bleed
The pain is all I need
To go on

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My paper,pen,inspiration,
I owe u these and more..

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I grope for words in the darkness
And weave a dream
To wake up again to ur silence
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34 comments:

Rony said...

Kaise batau main tumhe ,
mere liye tum koun ho???
kaise??? kaise batau main tumhe ,
tum dharkano ka geet ho,
jiwan ka tum sangeet ho,
tum zindagi, tum bandagi, tum roshni,
tum tazgi, tum har khushi , tum pyar ho,
tum preet ho, manmeet ho,..aankho me tum,
saanso me tum, yaado me tum. aaho me tum.
nindo me tum khawabo me tum.,
tum ho meri har baat mein,.
tum ho meri din raat mein,
tum subah me tum sham mein,
tum soch me tum kaam mein
mere liye pana bhi tum,
mere liye khona bhi tum,
mere liye hasna bhi tum,
mere liye rona bhi tum, or jagna sona bhi tum..
jau kahi dekhu kahi, tum ho waha tum ho wahi...
kaise batau main tumhe ,tum bin to main kuch bhi nahi..
kaise batau main tumhe ,mere liye tum koun ho ..........

Rony said...

Hey the above poem is by no means mine....but your post reminded me of it. It's from th movie Yugpurush whre nana Patekar does this faboulous monologue.

pdey said...

And when I feel, fair creature of an hour,
That I shall never look upon thee more,
Never have relish in the faery power
Of unreflecting love--then on the shore
Of the wide world I stand alone, and think
Till love and fame to nothingness do sink
- Keats

Saurabh said...

stop hurting yourself...its enough

zoxcleb said...

haiku craze?
i really like the last one!
it strikes a chord..and resonates..
will let you know why, when i figure it out myself.

Aparna Kar said...

@rony
Oh..for a moment I thought it's from Wajood
starring Nana Patekar n Madhuri Dixit...

Aparna Kar said...

@pdey
Hmmm.. John Keats..the first name that comes to my mind when I think of unrequited romantic love..
His La Belle Dame Sans Merci is my all time favourite..

Aparna Kar said...

@Saurabh
Lol..dnt worry..it's a luxury I indulge only in once in a while..
Let's not get serious here...
But thx for the concern :)
U r a real buddy:)

Aparna Kar said...

@zoxcleb
It does?
Well..It might..
coz it's not only abt my voice not reaching out to the other person..it's about his/her not being able to comprehend the meaning..the way I want him/her to..

rohit said...

would u tell me please..what exactly do u mean to say when u write.."i stab my heart and all...i need pain"??

i have told u a lot of times..u neutralise the negative energies. that,u..me...everyone can make world a better place to live...then,why do u talk of 'pain' O Lady..?

why do u play like this with words?:)

@ others...no guesses for 'you' people??

Aparna Kar said...

@Rohit
Dnt u think u know me just tooo well?
:))
U knw what..I just cudn't sleep
one night N I started tip tapping on my keyboard..what came out was placed under the title Musings

I dnt know y some people think everything tht is put on my blog has something to do wth my personal life..

u know me..I am too obsessed wth myself..to be in love wth someone else..LMAO

Aparna Kar said...

@Rony

Oh btw..if u used to dig tht poem too..no need to go to Google..U have it right...here....

'O WHAT can ail thee, knight-at-arms,
Alone and palely loitering?
The sedge is wither'd from the lake,
And no birds sing.

'O what can ail thee, knight-at-arms, 5
So haggard and so woe-begone?
The squirrel's granary is full,
And the harvest 's done.

'I see a lily on thy brow
With anguish moist and fever dew; 10
And on thy cheeks a fading rose
Fast withereth too.'

'I met a lady in the meads,
Full beautiful—a faery's child,
Her hair was long, her foot was light, 15
And her eyes were wild.

'I made a garland for her head,
And bracelets too, and fragrant zone;
She look'd at me as she did love,
And made sweet moan. 20

'I set her on my pacing steed
And nothing else saw all day long,
For sideways would she lean, and sing
A faery's song.

'She found me roots of relish sweet, 25
And honey wild and manna dew,
And sure in language strange she said,
"I love thee true!"

'She took me to her elfin grot,
And there she wept and sigh'd fill sore; 30
And there I shut her wild, wild eyes
With kisses four.

'And there she lullèd me asleep,
And there I dream'd—Ah! woe betide!
The latest dream I ever dream'd 35
On the cold hill's side.

'I saw pale kings and princes too,
Pale warriors, death-pale were they all;
They cried—"La belle Dame sans Merci
Hath thee in thrall!" 40

'I saw their starved lips in the gloam
With horrid warning gapèd wide,
And I awoke and found me here,
On the cold hill's side.

'And this is why I sojourn here 45
Alone and palely loitering,
Though the sedge is wither'd from the lake,
And no birds sing.'

rohit said...

do u mean to say that what music came from that "tip-tapping" was musings??

and well...at times,i do fall in the category of such people..but there are times when i don't..

and people,when she has answered my question..i guess we dont need further brainstorming:p the girl is in love with her "self" :)

enjoy,

Aparna Kar said...

@Rohit
when u learn to make fun of ur pain...
they stop hurting[:P]

Kandarp said...

I don't know you, may never know you. But your words are strong, they carry a lot of meaning. Don't ever waste them!

zoxcleb said...

now thats something we all want.. the other person to understand what we say... in the weird ways we say it...

btw, where exactly are u making fun of ur pain?

Aparna Kar said...

@kandarp
I will try not to..[:)]

Aparna Kar said...

@zoxcleb
It's all about learning not to take life too seriously...

wordmonkey said...

well, nice words, personal or impersonal

Aparna Kar said...

@wordmonkey
Umm...thanks:)
specially coz the last clause wasn't a question...

JB (Dinoroule) said...

"I stab my heart ..I make it bleed
The pain is all I need
To go on"

Ouch! That is masochistic.

Sounds like failed pulp-fiction

Aparna Kar said...

@jb
Lol..tht was..

Aparna Kar said...

@jb
But freedom to express boss!
u have it..I have it too :)

JB (Dinoroule) said...

Sure we do - and that's the scariest part.

Have fun blogging!

zoxcleb said...

hmmm...

i dont think i ever will.. at least not now.

Aparna Kar said...

@zoxcleb
serious? or not serious?

zoxcleb said...

serious...
so many twists and turns.. its like a scifi novel these days!

Aparna Kar said...

@zoxcleb
tell me abt it

zoxcleb said...

:-)

Capricious Mind said...

lovely line... made me kept reading them... shucks... ur really good!!!

Aparna Kar said...

@capricious mind

Thx...(head bowed)
I am really humbled ...

Prasoon said...

wonderful ...
simply awesome !!

Aparna Kar said...

@prasoon
Thank U
Thank U
Thank u
Thank u....
Sheesh...
there I go again..
Seems I have been bitten by an Obsessive compulsive disorder bug..
But honestly..Thanks:)

Bj said...

i am in surch of a life partner and would like to see if it is you, like to get to know you better and let you see the life from my eyes and see your life with yours.

Aj