My happy ending

I was reading this article in NYTimes, and I was fascinated to think how similar it is to my story.

For three years now, I have kept quiet about it, because sometimes I was not sure. But for every moment of doubt, there always have been innumerable other moments of faith surging in.

Yesterday, I had an exam to take and had to leave for my class, but there was an UPS delivery expected, made as an exception after three failed attempts. My roommates weren't around either, so I asked SG to come over and receive the shipment for me.

When I came back, he had left but I found notes all over my place. One of the best feelings in the world is knowing that someone is so completely and utterly in love with you.

And it all started with his comments on my blog. Almost an year after he had first tried to chat with me (in Summer 2005) and I had rejected his invitation on an online community, we started chatting again (in June 2006).

It was a phase of my life artists call 'blue', when painters can't identify with any other color than the colors of melancholy. I wrote sad posts sometimes, though, trying hard to restrain my emotions. A public display of any kind would have been vulgar. I doubt the same now, but I want to write something about us. Preferably, the truth.

He was in Cambridge, I was in Noida. We talked to each other every day over the phone. We have been doing it ever since. Soccer, Cliff Richard, discourses of Swami Vivekananda, Existentialism and Camus, are a few keywords from our initial conversations. Though I tried hard to avoid talking to him, mostly on the pretext that I am at office and have work - I found myself drawn to him. It took me a while to realize and accept what it really meant to me.

The first day we met (on Dec 11th, 2006), he proposed to me with a ring, saying : 'I take you as my legally wedded wife.' I still tease about not marrying him until he proposes to me formally. (You know- where I have a chance to say ' No' and be a runaway bride)

Last Summer was the toughest. I was certain there could be no 'us'. I was angry and mad at him. But things change. Someone once told me that if he doesn't love you the way you want, it doesn't necessarily mean that he doesn't love you. I agree now. In fact, it is better to be laid back sometimes and let them surprise you pleasantly.

I don't know what the future holds for us. But I know one thing for sure - if I can't be happy with him, I can't be happy with anyone else either.