Khushwant Singh once said: When you want to see the worst examples of urban prejudices- where do you turn to? The matrimonial ads columns!
A friend of mine recently voiced the same concern and said that he was unlike the prejudiced Indian males and had very few expectations from his life partner. He even helped me script a matrimonial ad which I promised to put up in my blog, which , according to him has viewers from all over the world. (I could have denied it but ..unfortunately he knows the many uses of site meter)
So here it is:
Wanted Bride.
Young, slim, fair and extremely beautiful. Highly educated. Should earn in six figures but should not mind giving away her salary to husband on the day of pay. Should have good mix of Eastern and Western values. Must enjoy cooking Indian food. Must have a great sense of humor (read:be amused by my poor jokes). But should not laugh too loudly. We will measure the length of her smile with a tape and tell her the perfect fits for respective occasions- so don't worry about it.
Should have impeccable social etiquette.Should have an ear for Indian Classical music. Should be an exponent in Bhajan-kirtaan.
Should be back before 8 pm everyday. Should not complain when asked to do domestic work after long office hours because we plan to get rid of the maid after I get married. Should not mind if the decision to have a child is unilateral, i.e, mine. Should not make it a ground to file for divorce.
...And if at all we settle for an innocent divorce, should not ask for alimony.
Here's a pic of my friend while heading for office.
Don't mind the hooves and horns. Despite the misleading appearance, he's a very gentle soul.
For close ups please mail to mrtaurus@hotbull.com
(LINK: Case of Samar Ghosh vs Jaya Ghosh,Mental cruelty to spouse, Supreme Court )
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22 comments:
If the guy in mauve shirt is ur friend he attracts bulls not Homo sapien females.
If Mr. Taurus is ur friend he does not need any ad in ur blog / newspaper.
let me know if you find one of this unique species. i might be interested ;-)
well said..... about the urban indian prejudice! matrimonial columns are our showcase of the sick indian mentalilty to be displayed to the outside world!
@candid
You must have missed reading the part where I mentioned "Don't mind the hooves and horns." I didn't notice whether the guy in the pink shirt had hooves and horns. None that I could see at least.
Mr. Taurus is a very good friend of mine and he doesn't want to waste money by advertising in newspapers. When you have a free platform of reasonable public access, why bother?
@arnab
I'm interested myself :)
Who doesn't want a wife like that? :D
@inktank
I wouldn't generalize it or call it "sick" mentality. There are some progressive Indian males who think otherwise ( I hope )
It's time most people realized that women have more in life to do than play the role of traditional wives. The men are no longer the one who bring home the beacon. Women are contributing to the financial health of a family. It's a lot tougher to juggle career, kids and an equally demanding husband- but if there is no acknowledgment from the receiving end, you can understand the frustration.
But how many people would want their daughters to be careerists than be "good" Indian brides? Not many. A vendible single maid of marriageable age is a horror to the relatives and members of the extended family.
I know a woman who 'd rather believe that her 31-year old spinster daughter is a lesbian than accept the fact that she is just another woman who wants to be single until (if at all ) the right person comes along.
I believe compatibility can be created. But sacrifices have to be made from both sides to achieve that .
It's like - you have work hard on a relation day in and day out- build on it everyday.. it's when we start taking things for granted, we lose the delicate balance and conflicts arise.
Women empowerment also requires a contemporary change in the general attitude of Indian society.
Not every one gets to become Naina Lal Kidwai or Kiran Mazumder Shaw but at least give them a chance!
horny bastard :)will get a doodhwaali..
suggestion..put the pic somewhere else and just leave a link here..
@ passer-by
Seems like a good match. :D
Any ways I 'm taking your advice and also giving the link to my idea of a perfect male :D
wow...what an advert....i would have never expected such an advert in any martimonial website...but then in ur blog neethng is possible :D
hehe u want me to help u out...know loads of khatals nearby which churn out our the required specimens day in day out ... :D
well on a serious note...the mail id really sounds macho...if its not taken......can i book it...just for getting more mails origintaing from the desired sex :D
on a more serious note....its scotch speaking....not me...:) but yeah if the readers like the comments...then its me :D
btw, i didn't quite get your take on the ghosh vs ghosh story. i think it's a perfectly reasonable ground for divorce, in absence of a pre-nup stating otherwise. of course, such things should be discussed and agreed upon before marriage and not after the fact!
@saikat
Well .. hee hee.. you know me.. INSANITY FOREVER :D
Kuch bhi ho sakta hai...
What less could you expect?
Btw, Don't worry about the scotch.. raat ko pi to subah utaar hi jayegi :P
Main to kehti hoon tu pikar hi likha kar :)) Brings out the wicked in you..
And yeah.. the mail id doesn't exist as of yet.. Get a domain name or personalized email id and then tell me
waise bacchu.. mails to ayenge tujhe ladkiyo k.. par Varmala nahi.. jhoote aur chappal.. so u can open up a second-hand (or leg ?) sandal shop.. :))
How to market the products is up to you.. I'm here to think the tag lines for you :D
I was thinking of starting in my blog the game we were playing the other day.. kye kehta hai shuru kare?
Chalo.. find something to go with the product : Sandal
A tagline and a story for a TV commercial
***Anyone interested can play it :)
@passer by
Don't worry.. any female with a bit of sense would know that it takes more than just horns to sustain a long-term relation.. but I think you missed the flowers :D the sensitive part I mean :)
@ saiki
LOL... I think you just got a compliment there :D
@arnab
I didn't have any take on the the Ghosh vs Ghosh case. It was a link for those who are interested in the SC verdict related to it and the resulting definition by SC of the grounds of "Mental Cruelty" to spouse.
Of course , you must have realized the whole ad is ridiculous. No one is that honest :D
Though most would want to own a trophy wife like that!
Who doesn't want a beautiful, smart, financially independent , virtuous and extremely desirable wife who doesn't have a say of her own in her home!
Lol. What a paradox . Some people would almost wish it were true!
Just wait.. some company is surely working on to get better forms of androids to serve people like that.
Who needs a real woman? With real emotions and insecurities.. ?
yeah insanity forever :D ...knowing both of us...insanity will surely live forever..even after we die..through our genetic lineage :)
peene aur likhne ka to bahut purana rishta hain ...life ka moral jaam pe jaam peeye jaaon..zindagi bas aaj hain...use ek azaad panchii ke tarah jeeye jaaon
abt sandals n chappals being garlanded ..well wont mind...but puhleeze always smack down in pairs :D ...will open an e-retail site...for used chapplas n sandals...u just have to create the enviroment that each of these chappals has a story to tell...want to add ur story to it :D
now abt the game :P ...
Product : Sandal
Targetted Audience: MC/LMC/MMC/UMC
Age Group: 15-55
Print Ad: Quarter Page Ad Size
Visualization: A slender leg wearing the sandal,(the sandal is placed at 3/4 of the vertcal and horizentally 2/5 from left and merges with the top right edge) with the base of the feet up...and an imprint clearly shown on the sand/mud below of the sandal. On the mark created on the ground, wriiten in the shape of the sandal - xyz/22/fashion designer/trendy/dreamer . The top left edge has a quarter of a sun adding on to the contrast
Baseline: written below the pic
Every Step Leaves A Story Behind...So Whats Your Story
Punchline: Written at the bottom right beside a pic of the same sandal
Sandal (Give ur own brand name) - For Imprinting All The Stories Being Told
*phew* that came in one straight flow...now can i get some creative analysis of the same :D
@saiki
Awesome
Just what I had thought. Though-
"Every step tells a story.. what's yours?" would be crisper :D
Btw, of all things I really like the awareness messages. Here's one of my favs:
AIDS AWARENESS MESSAGE FOR ALL CARELESS FUCKERS:
Instead of trying same position with different girls, try different positions with the same girl. Be faithful to your partner. Prevent AIDS
I also liked the slogan on this T-shirt designed by a girl suffering from anorexia nervosa-
The front reads : 20% will die from their eating disorder
Back: I REFUSE to become a statistic
We can try scripting messages for:
1. AIDS awareness
2. Blood donation
3. Literacy campaign
4. Care for the girl child
And for heaven's sake -get another Gmail id, I don't frequent yahoo and the blog is the most convenient way to reach out to you... ya phir kisi se request kara na padega?
Btw, hav u seen DIM lately? Seems he's keeping a low profile now-a-days :D
P.S Ask Deepti about Udayan centre in Noida.. I registered for CRY.
nah! reality is overrated :P
@arnab
aaha! wud u care to explain?
appu: on ur request (nah not any special request needed :P ) 'll be back on GT ... will ask my frnds to hack back my old pwd which i for now have conveniently forgotten
abt the aids slogan *thumbsup*
'll post more socially relevant slogans...now u have brought back the ad-mad streak back in me :P
dnt tell has DIM got a hunch of the insanity thats going to strike him...aila use jaldi se yahaa bulaoo...aur humahare insanity-yat se unhe milao :D
just reached back home..do tc.. :)
@Aparna...redg ur aids caption...i see it bit clumsy...its taking on the whole F*** biased to male gender...but in reality as of now in India...atleast in metropolitan and cosmopolitan the situation is bit diff!...i really do want to comment...but it will be hard and harsh! :-(
@ arun: Just change girl to guy...rest remains the same...the msg conveyed is same...yippeee now :)
@saikat : he he he he he he no comments!
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